Making lesbians happy – one book at a time!

Microwave Calisthenics

“What are you doing?” Emma asked.
“I’m doing my exercises,” I replied.
I’d just finished my second set of 10 calve raises. My ginseng herbal tea still had another sixty seconds to warm in the microwave and with no interruptions I could pull out 30 squats in the remaining time.
“In front of the microwave in your pajamas?” Em continued with the interrogation.
“Is there a problem with that? I’m multi-tasking and increasing the blood flow to my brain.” I resumed doing my squats.


“What is she doing?” Layce asked Emma. She’d taken to inquiring with Emma whenever my behavior disturbed her. I think she was afraid of offending me by asking me directly.
“She’s multi-tasking in her pajamas.”
I took my tea out of the microwave, placed it on the bar, and headed upstairs. I brought down my book. Then I went back upstairs and brought down my glasses. Then I took the laundry upstairs.
I came back downstairs and got the milk out of the fridge for my tea. I did three sets of ten of bicep curls with the half full gallon milk jug. I sat on the chair, strapped on my ankle weights and did ten leg lifts on either leg.
By this time Layce and Emma were both concerned.
“What?” I said, getting off the chair. I began my ascent up the stairs again.
“You’ve been up and down a lot today. Maybe you should make a note about what you need to bring down so you don’t have to make so many trips,” Layce suggested.
“I know, but that’s the point,” I said, as I powered upstairs taking two steps at a time.
On the way back down with my phone and sneakers, I overheard Emma say to Layce, “Maybe you should just get her that BowFlex she wants so bad. Then she could exercise like normal people.”
I smiled. My evil plan was working.


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Comments on: "Microwave Calisthenics" (8)

  1. Your nefariousness, or is it nefariosity, or nefariousicity… whatever it is it astounds me. Wish I had someone I could manipulate into getting me a bowflex. Thanks for the laugh and the plan.

  2. Oh, and thanks for the picture of Jack Lalanne, Used to watch his show when I was young.

    • Me too. I was fascinated with Jack and his amazing abilities. I know not why except that I was an odd child.

      • You and me both, I guess. He was so strange in his black leotard thing and ballet slippers doing jumping jacks. What an odd thing to remember. And it’s taking up space in my brain that could be better used for things like the meeting that I blew off today because I totally forgot.

  3. I hope you get the exercise gear you are after. Thanks again for another laugh out loud moment.

  4. Adorable… Though I don’t know why you even need a bow flex since you obviously have the creativity to workout with any old household item. 🙂

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